Space Chimp
5,4,3,2,1 blast off! I was so scared that I might not survive for 65 years because there is no gravity. I was being sent to space for a science experiment, to see what will happen to a human when they go to space for 65 years, because I'm like a human. So they sent me up to space for 65 years.
My rocket started to rumble as it broke up. The fuel capsule detached leaving my space pod to orbit silently in space.
“I'm ok,” I said. Then I fell Into a coma for 65 years. When I opened my eyes I was like what happened? When I looked at my picture of Jeff I miss him instantly. I was still not happy because I can't see my trainer Jeff, but I ask if I can take a picture with my trainer Jeff they said ‘Ok’ so now I will remember Jeff. But I'm still in space I'm going to sleep because I'm so tired I looked at milky way, It shone bright like a diamond. It was beautiful as a sunset and I know that I'm close to earth I was so happy that I saw milky way. So I know that earth was near by. I fell asleep. When I woke, up by the sun, I fell asleep again. When I woke up I saw light blue and green ball I started remember where I am and the the ball Is Its EARTH. It made a smile on m//y face I haven't smiled for 65 years until now. I had a little bit of gas in the space pod I used it to go back to earth. When I was speeding down to earth it was like a earthquake happened in space it was really scary I could see my parachute pop out to slow me down so don't have really bad cuts that I could die from when I landed I heard a THUD knew I landed I could see the dust from the space ship.
Terra firma!
When I got out my space pod I was really wobbly like a newborn calf. I nearly fell over because I haven't been on my feet for 65 years. The trees was as lifeless as Mars. I looked around to see my owner or if someone going to greet me back to earth. No one did I felt sad I started to cry. I was running to find my owner Jeff until my legs gave up. I fell over and went to sleep. When I woke up I saw my owner Jeff and he said,’ You will find me one day.’ Then Jeff disappeared I just realized I was daydreaming and then I got on my feet and started to run again to look for my owner.Then I bumped into the space station and I looked around for my owner. There was a bed and someone was there and they left so I stayed there for the night It was dark like black paint. When I fell asleep I dreamed that I found my owner Jeff, and then I woke up to look for him again in the N.A.S.A space station. BOOM I got hit in the head by someone. I ask myself where am I, was it a trap? I don’t know but all I what to do is look for my owner Jeff. I heard them saying "We killed space chimp". ‘Space chimp is old like a turtle’ they said. I felt sad because they called me old but I don't care I just what my owner Jeff so we can live together. I thought that I was in a dream. And then I bit my self in the arm and then I yelled awww and then the 2 person look at me but they weren't human they were chimps like me. I got up and I started running and they were running after me I started to cry because I don't want to die without my owner Jeff.Then I saw Jeff and ran to give him a big hug and we ran together but I didn't know that Jeff hit them on the back of the head, And there head was bleeding. Then a big chimp came out and he had a knife and stabbed Jeff in the heart and I started to cry, and then I got stabbed in the heart and I looked at the darkness but I'll be in there for ever not for 65 years that was worst. I was Breathing slowly as if I were calm. I said before I died ‘ I'll miss you Jeff’ then I passed away.
Wow done josef i really really like your space chimp because i think now when i do my space chimp i now what to do now and can you all so comment on my blog as will from manaia ...
ReplyDeleteGreat story Josef! I thought the part about wobbling like a newborn calf was really effective. It would be great to see you using speech marks in your writing so that it makes it clearer when someone is talking. Great to see such good quality writing from you. Did you find the video helpful?
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DeleteYes the video was help full.
DeleteAwesome work Josef. I really liked the simile you used about your feet be as wobbly as a new born calf. Next time I want you to be aware of how you start sentences. You use 'Then' and 'I' a lot. What other words could you use instead of 'Then'?
ReplyDeleteThank you spotting that next time I write a story i'll try not to add 'Then' and 'I' next time but thanks for commenting that. This is really helpfull.
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